Don't go suggesting those 12-step programs for me. They're full of grumpy cats and that just makes me grumpier. Plus this one followed me home. I think he's a stalker. Wht doesn't he get in a 12-step program for that?
I wasn't always this way. Years ago, my brother George and I were quite close. The Human rescued us together. I took care of my little brother. I licked him and cleaned him up and made sure he got enough food. Then he grew up. He doesn't need me anymore. All he thinks about is lying around eating
and trying to slip out the front door to spend some time with his fiance.
I don't even think they're really engaged. That makes me even grumpier.
So when the Human started on this necklace and earring set this week, I knew what I needed to do. You see, she uses these gemstones, and they have special properties.
She found some Brecciated Jasper. She explained to me that Brecciated Jasper is used for astral traveling, like I'm gonna be doing any of that any time soon. Not in this mood. And it can help in communication with animals. Excuse me, but I can talk just fine with other animals. But then she hit the clincher: it brings happiness and a good outlook on life. Sign me up! Where can I get some of that? Oh. right here.
It was only a matter of minutes before one of those suckers hit the floor and I was on it like white on rice. She crawled on her hands and knees for a good half hour but she never found the piece. I stuck it under the desk with the spiders. She doesn't like to stick her hand in there, though maybe she should use some Brecciated Jasper and talk to the spiders. Now THERE'S an irritating bunch.
Bu then she was unstringing the whole thing. Guess she had a better plan. And apparently she did. She added some Goldstone. Those are the round sparkly ones between the Brecciated Jasper.
And she said... get this... it's used for positive energy and is gently uplifting. It can even induce happy thoughts.
So when one of those Goldstone beads dropped, I pretended I was playing with it. Doing that cat thing always amuses the Human. Sometimes she'll go for the camera but I like to stop playing before she can snap a picture. It might ruin my image.
Anyway, I've been keeping those beads under the pillow of my bed. And it must be working.
See. I'm looking cheerier already.
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