Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Real Housewives' Teresa Giudice: Diamonds, Debt and Delusion

(EPISODE SPOILER ALERT!)

Diamond jewelry is often the perfect way to celebrate a big anniversary like your 10th. There's the three-stone 'past, present, future' ring, an anniversary band, a nice pair of diamond studs - all possibilities at prices that will put you back a few hundred or maybe a grand if you shop smart.

But say, oh, you're $11 million in the red? Maybe this isn't the best time in the world to ask for a buncha (insert Eartha Kitt growl) "Diamondzzzzzzz", right? But that's not our delusional friends, Teresa and Joe Giudice from the Real Housewives of New Jersey.

How stupid, I mean, delusional can you be?


Exhibit A: When Teresa brings up that she wants anniversary diamondzzzzz to her friend Jacqueline, Jacqueline wants more details:

Jacqueline: "The Crown Jewels?

Teresa: "No, not the Crown Jewel," Teresa scoffs. "What do you think I am, Arabic or something ... Or wait, is that Indian?"

Exhibit B: In their CHARTERED HELICOPTER RIDE OVER MANHATTAN to celebrate their anniversary because that's what you do when you're $11 million short - curious Joe asks the pilot,

"That's a nice park in the middle of the city."

Pilot: "That's Central Park."

You're a lifelong Jersey resident and that little tidbit of geography didn't trickle down to you at some juncture? A diamond may be forever but this stuff is just priceless.

So, in the end? Teresa got her diamond wish and then some - a huge yellow diamond ring smushed in a chocolate dessert that had to have put Einstein back an SUV or two. When you're $11 million in the hole, what's a few more zeros?

Did I mention they are $11 million in debt?

What did you guys think of her rock? Real or fugazi? And what about Danielle Staub busting out with her (HUGE) diamond engagement ring from her EX HUSBAND to wear to her daughter's Sweet Sixteen party in front of his new (smaller-diamond-wearing) wife?

Just when you thought the class had left in a chartered helicopter over Central Park...

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