My Name is Sh*t. Jack Sh*t.

Ever
since I lost 00.7 lbs. at my last weigh-in, I’ve been haunted by
visions of an overweight secret agent running around town and getting
into high-fat trouble. Here’s my list of James Bond movies if 007 was
307...

• Dr. No Willpower


• From Russia With Lard


• Thunderbaloney


• You Only Eat Twice


• On Her Majesty's Secret Snackrun


• Donuts Are Forever


• Live and Let Diet


• The Man with the Golden Twinkee


• The Spy Who Loved Meat


• Moonpieraker


• For Your Mouth Only


• Chocopussy


• A View to a Meal


• License to Grill


• Diet Another Day


• Casino Fudge Royale


• Quantum of Salsa