A brief answer, in verse.
He might have been a Roman priest
Entombed on Via Flaminia
Or else a priest from Viterbo
Who caused his boss chagrinia.
Or else he was a bishop who
Hailed from Province Raetia
Unless he was the hermit priest
Who kept his life discreetia.
Whoever was Valentius
His day is rife with phobias
For men who lapse and fail to gift
On all parts of the globe-ias.
So if you shake and quake with fear
When this saint's day is nearing ya
Check out the brightandshinythings
To which I'm quickly steering-ya.
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