How Raven Created the World

Raven

 A Tlingit Legend

In the beginning there was nothing but water, darkness, and Raven.  Raven flew through the darkness with a bag that he had hung around his neck.

Raven flew and flew.  As flew, he grew tired, and so he removed a rock from his bag and dropped it into the sea.  That rock became the first land.

Raven flew down to the land to rest. As he sat, he removed more stones from his bag and dropped them into the water.  Those became the rest of the land.

Feeling rested, Raven picked up his bag once more and took to the sky.  But soon he grew tired again.  He perched on a rock and removed more items from his bag:  the fir, the pine, the spruce, the redwood and all the trees of the world.

Then he removed the wild strawberry, and the huckleberry bush, the grasses and plants of the world and those of the sea.  He scattered these across land and water so they, too, could grow.

Raven placed the bag back around his neck and started to fly again, through the darkness.  When he tired, he perched on a rock and reached into his bag.  This time he pulled out the animals of the world: the wolf, the salmon, the eagle, the bear, the deer, and all other animals of land and sea.

Raven looked around him at the world he created.  It was a good world - one in which there was much peace and happiness.

But Raven could feel something else inside his pouch.  He looked and saw that there was one thing remaining.

Raven reached into the bag and removed man.  Raven placed man on earth to care for and respect all of Raven's creations.

The ravens in these earrings were crafted by Lauren Bramble of Crowbirdie Beads.  The earrings are wire-wrapped with sterling silver wire.  The charm is sterling, as well.  The earrings drop approximately 1-1/2" (3.81 cm) beneath sterling leverback earrings.

Cost is $65.  Shipping within the US and Canada is $2.00.  Elsewhere, shipping is $5.

More Halloween delights can be found at the EHAG Emporium.

Dancing for the Day of the Dead on a (Nearly) Wordless Wednesday

(Mine, which are easier to wear, can be found on etsy.)

Interview with Hungry Girl Lisa Lillien

I can’t stay mad at Hungry Girl. Sure, she completely stole my idea of having a series of bestselling cookbooks and then parlaying that into a TV show and worldwide fame. That was totally MY idea, Lisa!



But she’s so bubbly and sparkly and effervescent and carbonated that it’s no wonder that she’s amassed such a loyal foodie following.  Despite being a mega-star, Lisa agreed to a no-holds-barred interview… Jack-Sh*t-style!





Jack:  Julia Child once said “The best way to execute French cooking is to get good and loaded and whack the hell out of a chicken. Bon appétit.” Do you have something equally cool to say about cooking?



Lisa: Definitely not.




Jack:  I read somewhere that you originally named your site Hungry Girl because you were born in Hungary? What’s it like being Hungarian?

Lisa: I was born in Brooklyn... But so many people misspell Hungry as Hungary and now I know why. They assumed it was my birth city.




Jack:  Have you ever had a Hungry-Man frozen dinner?



Lisa:  Oh god yes! As a child I lived for the 3 piece fried chicken dinner. I  LOVED when the apple pie goo leaked into the mashed potatoes.




Jack:  What is Salisbury steak anyway?



Lisa: I always wondered that myself. I think it's just a "dinner" hamburger.




Jack:  What’s your favorite condiment?



Lisa: Ketchup. Good old ketchup! Close second and third salsa and mustard...




Jack:  Hmmmm, I’ve never tried salsa and mustard. Would you rather live without sugar or salt?



Lisa: Sugar.




Jack:  Riddle break: You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you just eat?



Lisa: Corn. Or I did a really bad job with a frozen dinner...




Jack:  If you accidentally ate your own tongue, what do you think it’d taste like?



Lisa: Chicken.




Jack:  I heard that you once waited over an hour to meet Jack Sh*t.



Lisa: That is a rumor.




Jack:  What do you do when an endangered animal eats endangered plants?



Lisa:  Cry.




Jack:  Tell me your deepest, darkest secret… something you’ve never told even your closest friend.



Lisa: I once at an entire can of Reddi-Wip.

Jack:  Do you ever get intimidated by the “Cooking with Jack” segments I do on my blog?



Lisa: Define “intimidated”. They scare me, but not sure it's the same thing...




Jack:  What’s the best thing about being Hungry Girl?



Lisa: I get to eat food and taste things all day. Close second? Interviews like this one...




Jack:  Do you ever have the urge to slap Rachel Ray when you’re on her show?



Lisa:  No but I feel sure she would have the urge to slap you because you spelled her name wrong.




Jack:  That was a test... by the way, what’s new with your TV show?



Lisa: The set is BRAND NEW! And this season is more action-packed and recipe-loaded!




Jack:  Don’t you need a funny assistant?



Lisa:  Yes. Know anyone funny?













So You Think You Can Tweet! As I may have mentioned 5,000 or so times, I've been named as one of the Top 50 Most Inspirational Healthy Tweeps. If you feel like messing with it and have 15 seconds of free time, go vote for me here.

I Never Saw a Purple Dog...

My Neighbor's Dog is Purple

by Jack Prelutsky

My neighbors’ dog is purple;
its eyes are large and green,

its tail is almost endless,

the longest I have seen.

My neighbors’ dog is quiet,

it does not bark one bit,

but when my neighbor’s dog is near,

I feel afraid of it.

My neighbor’s dog looks nasty,

it has a wicked smile…

before my neighbor painted it,
it was a crocodile.

Your own purple dog and alligator can be found here.

That Trainer

I don't know that I'd have done this song if I'd realized Garth Brooks 

was such a hardass about sharing his work...

I went to work out with a trainer,
A fat-ass guy with flab to spare.
She was a scary Nazi woman,
With muscles on her everywhere.
We had a session set for noontime,
Spandex pants on my rear end.
One word from Mistress Helga,
I knew she wasn’t my dear friend.

She came up to me in her office,
A glint of evil in her eyes.
She told me in a voice filled with menace,
“Put down that stupid bag of fries!”
I threw the sack down in the trash can,
And wiped the ketchup from my chin.
A hard expression covered her face,
“Let’s let the punishment begin!”



She had a need to make me whimper.
To attack my body like a viper.
To watch me cry just like a baby
Who had crapped all in his diaper.
She had to keep me doing lunges,
‘Til my kneecaps loudly popped
Worked me out ‘til I said “owwwth”
Threw up a bit inside my mouth,
And my heart had nearly stopped.



That savage bitch was all up on me.


Nothing between us but weight stuff.


When I told her, “I can’t lift that.” 


She softly whispered “You creampuff!”


And then I watched her hands of iron 


Snatch the bar up and do a curl.
There’s never been another summer,


When I felt like such a little girl.





She had a need to make me stronger,
To ignore every complaint.
To bend my body to it’s limit,
And catch me when I start to faint.
We worked out for an entire hour.
Sixty minutes of agony.
She made me lift a ton.
Someone please call 9-1-1,
I think I’m now an amputee.

I often think about that session.


The sweat, the leg lifts, and the screams.
I’ve got new bumps on my arms now,
Or at least that’s what it seems. 


And every time I hit the gym now,
I make my workouts more intense.
I hope she never learns I are
The person who keyed up her car.
Or from her I’ll have no defense.



She had a need to make me sweat more.


To raise my workouts up a notch.
To laugh when I dropped dumbbells
On my foot or on my crotch.
She was as mean as a barracuda.
She thought that I was pretty strange.
I made her kind of angry,
She just stared at me blankly,


When I paid with a jar of change.





Yeah, I’d say she was pretty pissed.
Hit me with an open fist.  

 
Now I’m on her Sh*t list.

Hippos Dancing in Fantasia

Last week, to celebrate my birthday, a group of us went to the Hollywood Bowl.  They were showing Fantasia with the Hollywood Bowl orchestra playing the music and John Maucieri conducting.  We all brought food and wine to share.  My sister made two amazing cakes, which we managed to light up before the ushers caught us playing with fire, and we had a wonderful night, complete with fireworks and a visit from Mickey Mouse.

One of my favorite parts of Fantasia is the hippos.  (In fact, you may have noticed my fondness for hippos is the past.)  And one of my favorite rhymes for the hippo couplet contest was when Donna rhymed Fantasia and dysplasia.  I believe her couplet said:

Hippos dancing in Fantasia Often suffer hip dysplasia.

So here, to share some of my birthday fun, are Fantasia hippos and a few of my hippo charms, which can be found on eBay and on etsy (or by messaging me here and telling me you desperately need hippos).  because, well... who doesn't?!

short hair styles

 short hair styles

 short hair styles

 short hair styles

 short hair styles

 short hair styles

 short hair styles

short hair styles

Beyonce's Blingy New Baby Bump

Beyonce's red carpet jewelry often steals the spotlight - especially when she brings out her best Lorraine Schwartz show-stoppers like she did at last night's MTV Video Music Awards. BUT...

It appears there is one accessory that trumps them all. A burgeouning blingy baby bump!

What better way to share the happy news than with a stunning off-the-shoulder Lanvin number and more emeralds and diamonds than any mere mortal has a right to wear at once! How much do you LOVE that emerald circle ring, jewelry hounds!?!

While metallic minis, bold cuffs, cocktail rings, parasols and um....snakes....were the other accessory trends of the night, you have to give it up for the divine Miss Sasha Fierce for making sure nothing could possibly upstage her big blingy reveal.

Except....maybe.....this....

Stay tuned this week on Jewelry.com where I'll be bringing you the hottest VMA jewelry moments in affordable looks you can bring home to your own jewelry box - or wear while framing a baby bump.