I think the majority of blog readers have the attention span of a gnat. I know that's true for me.
However, it you start your blog post off with a little pizzazz, chances are you'll hold my interest... and that of other readers.
• My first thought when I woke up in the kiddie pool filled with banana pudding was: "Oh my God... where's my tiara?"
• You know what I always say: "The party really doesn''t get started until the police show up," and last night was no exception...
• Entering the hot-dog eating competition was probably a mistake, especially considering all the waffles I had for breakfast.
• What do you say when your boss walks in while you're taking a dump in his desk drawer?
• It was both the first time I met a celebrity and the first time I was groin-punched by a transvestite.
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I didn't think when the evening began that I'd be driving home pantsless.
..
• In hindsight, it was probably a bad idea to adopt a baby wolverine, but he was so damn cute!
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I was starting to get angry and yelled at my spouse, "Who are you going to believe... me or those security tapes?"
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It was kind of embarrassing when, after the homeless dude pulled me out of the way of the oncoming bus, it turned out that I didn't have any spare change on me.
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