1.
Half a pound, half a pound,
Half a pound downward,
Down toward their goals,
A weight has been lifted.
“Forward, the Lighter Brigade!”
“Change for the better!” he said.
Down toward Goal Weight
With his fat kindred.
2.
“Forward, the Lighter Brigade!”
Did you see what they all weigh'd?
Oh, how confidence grew.
No workout’s been hinder’d:
Theirs not to cause a riot,
Theirs not to simply try it,
Theirs but to do and diet:
Down towards Goal Weight
Rode the fat kindred.
3.
Caramel to right of them,
Candy to left of them,
Buffet in front of them
They felt haggard and hunger’d
Bellies rumbled and thunder'd;
Tempt’d with snacks on shelf
Finally taking care of self
Boldly they go and well,
Into their jaws went less,
No longer feel like Hell.
Go, my fat kindred.
4.
Flash'd all their bodies bare,
Put on some underwear!
Flesh no longer in disrepair
Changing their body, while
All the world notice'd:
Plunged into workout-mode
Cracked the healthy eating code;
Excuses and bad habits
Flush’d down the commode
To depths remotest.
Others may gain back, but
Not my fat kindred.
5.
Salad to right of them,
Fresh fruit to left of them,
Fresh veggies in front of them
Steam’d and sauté’d;
Sprinkle'd with Mrs. Dash,
Olive oil (just a splash),
Have they’ve quit putting trash
Down thro' the jaws of theirs?
Oh yeah you bet your ash!
Little is left of them,
Left of my fat kindred.
6.
Let us their story share
‘Bout the new slacks they wear!
‘Bout this weight lifted.
Honor the change they made,
Honor the Lighter Brigade,
Not-so-fat kindred.
With apologies to Alfred, Lord Tennyson
