Corn Sugar? We Can Do Better Than That...

The other day I caught wind that the Corn Refiner's Association had petitioned the FDA to change the name of high-fructose corn syrup to "Corn Sugar."

“Corn Sugar”? That sounds like something you’d find at the fair, along with fiddlesticks and funnel cakes.

Here’s the thing, Corn Refiner’s Association. You read my blog. You know I’m great at naming stuff. Were you just too proud to beg for my help?

Anyway, here’s what I’ve got so far…

• Sweet Magic Corn Powder
  
  
• UniCorn
  
  
• Corny Corn Corn Corn
  
  
• High Fructose Chemical Syrup
  
  
• Love Dust
  
  
• Elixer of Life
  
  
• Cornballs
  
  
• Even Higher Fructose Corn Syrup
  
  
• Corncaine
  
  
• Golden Corn Sparkle
  
  
• Health Stuff
  
  
• Cornquelia
  
  
• A-Maize-Ment
  
  
• Super High Fructose Corn Syrup
  
  
• CornaUtopia
  
  
• Friendship Sauce
  
  
• Hug Friendship Corn Syrup
  
  
• Cornshine