• Stepped on scale with wrong foot first
• Shouldn't have carried 10-lb rabbit's foot for luck.
• Pissed off that old voodoo woman at the park.
• Nobody told me cheese fries had lot of calories.
• Prayed to God and Jesus, but completely forgot about Holy Ghost.
• Friends really let me down by dragging me to bar and forcing me to drink heavily.
• Boss won't let me telecommute from gym.
• Thought big gain would make more interesting blog material.
• Read that muscle weighs more than fat so I must have somehow grown a bunch of new muscles.
• Forgot "safe word" that scale and I had agreed upon.
• It's all food's fault for being some damned delicious.
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